#32 BRAZILBUTTLIFT ON QVC - Watch how it works! 9/12/12

More info click onto     IMDB www.imdb.me/joannabonaro

LET ME INTRODUCE YOU!....

AND YOU'LL HAVE A REAL GOOD TIME,

YOU'LL SEE,

YOU'LL.

HAVE. 

A REAL GOOD TIME.

(yes channeling Natalie)

 

 

http://www.qvc.com/Brazil-ButtLift-Lower-Body-Workout-with-3-DVD-%26-3-Booty-Bands.product.F05456.html

HELLO LADIES!  SO WHY THE CAPS? 

I SHOUT IT OUT ---
BECAUSE I KNOW WHAT IT IS LIKE TO BE MADE TO FEEL INVISABLE ----
AND I DON'T WANT YOU TO FEEL THAT WAY AT ALL...
OR EVER AGAIN.

I prefer the lady like term - INVINCIBLE 

ULTIMATELY ITS NOT ABOUT SIZE --- IT'S ABOUT FEELING GOOD ABOUT YOURSELF.

AND STAYING HEALTHY. 

ITS NOT ABOUT VANITY --

ITS FIRST AND FOREMOST  ABOUT YOUR MENTAL AND EMOTIONAL HEALTH ....

THE PHYSICAL BENEFITS ARE THE ICING ON THE CAKE OF YOUR LIFE.  

I AM TALKING ABOUT FEELING ---   JOY.

SO TAKE A CHANCE.

I GAIN NO MONETARY VALUE FROM THIS - ZILCH. 

I JUST WANT TO SHARE WHAT WORKED FOR ME.   

GET BACK YOUR STRENGTH, YOUR INNER BEAUTY & THE CONFIDENT WOMAN IN THE MIRROR. 

 

I WANT YOU TO WAKE UP AND FEEL ON FIRE EVERY SINGLE DAY....

 

-----FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE.   

http://www.qvc.com/Brazil-ButtLift-Lower-Body-Workout-with-3-DVD-%26-3-Booty-Bands.product.F05456.html

If you have questions, or concerns feel free to ask me.  I am on FB and also IMDB. I will advise you to the best of my experiences and my abilities.    I wish you LOVE AND GREAT JOY.   JOANNA



More info click onto



IMDB www.imdb.me/joannabonaro




 

#19 HOT OVER 40! PLAN B for BLUE COLLAR BABES 3/15/12

OK SO YOU ARE AN INJURED HOTTIE -

NOW WHAT DO YOU DO?

PLAN A   That's for the highly blessed, the super rich, or those who have great publicity agents and personal trainers. 

PLAN B  -  that's for our special group: BLUE COLLAR BABES. I used to bemoan this, however, I have learned that when life throws us curves, if we love them on our bodies, then we love them anywhere else, too.

WHEN PLAN A GOES ARRAY

I was injured recently while intensely training for a 1/2 Marathon.  Damn!  What to do? What to do?  All my fitness goals for the new year de-railed.  Doctors orders. After bemoaning my fate, I came up with some alternative exercise options even though I did have to give up the marathon in April.  

Plan A ---   running 5-6 miles 5x a week, gradually adding 2 miles a week

                    until I achieved 12 miles with ease.

My fave Brazil Buttlift classes 3x a week for 2 hours each

                   time; along with free weight training on alternating days.

                   Trampoline 2x a week just when watching TV. And anything

                    else I could come up with.  Eating for intense training.

then re-opened old injuries on elbow, shoulder, bicep, neck, and hip.

SOOOOOO ~~~

PLAN B - BE A BLUE COLLAR BABE HOTTIE EVEN WHEN INJURED

Plan B  ---  water aerobics 1x week,  elliptic 30 min. 3x (no arms) on
                   a low incline and effort (Level 5-9 not  12-15), lower body

                   weight machine training 2x a week. Stairs (19 floors) also very long, hilly 2-4 mile walks.  Eating Heaps of steamed broccolli and stringbeans.

Goal -- Healing... then....getting ripped bikini season of course! 

A Blue Collar Babe Over 40,50 or even 60 (Helen Mirren is an icon!) - wears bikini's proudly.  

You can do it. Transforming is a specialty of mine.  I believe in you.

(Don't worry we will be in touch for that - failure is not an option)

I saw this card in the store and had to pick it up -- it encapsulates this philosophy:

Life is all about how you handle plan B.

by Suzy Toronto

#20 HOT OVER 40! THE SACREDNESS OF STRINGBEANS 4/1/12

 A Joanna Dinner. Notice the Italian Lemon Juice.
Pictures by Joanna Bonaro 

STRINGBEANS - SENSATIONAL,  LOW CALORIE AND WHEN SEASONED ARE A GIRL'S BEST FRIEND.     

What can I say about stringbeans?  I wax poetic.  These have taken me from thick to thin and anything in-between. They are crunchy when raw, so that I satisfy my chewing fetish.  They let me absent mindedly munch when I am reading a book.  (A habit left-over from my 12-19thc English Lit and Acting double major college days - then it was corn muffins, but post 40 means adjustments must be made) 

When micro-waved, (yes I buy STEAMERS microwaveable bags, so that any cleaning up before or after is obliterated.  I believe in less work not more)  and seasoned with  Lemon Juice, garlic, 2 TBLspoons white wine, some H2O, and either curry or red pepper, they make a terrific dinner -- alone or with broiled sole, chicken or salmon.  Sublime!    Low Calorie -- guilt free -- finger food - no fork necessary, mindless, chewy, and tasty!  

Who could ask for anything more?  you live green to save the earth, why not eat green to save your body and your sanity?

When I am healthy and driven, or injured and held back, I rely on them.  When I go ballistic and I need to eat, eat, eat!!!!! and just pig out!!!!!!! - well it doesn't have to be so self-destructive.  It can be green and filling.  Then if I still need a Baci, well, my stomach is full, and the chocolate fix can be sated without eating a whole bar.  Stringbean's bring it back to "what am I doing to myself?" "Do I really want to do this?" (meaning the chocolate cookies or box, for that matter.) And, the next morning, "I am soooo veryyyyy proud of myself! Hurrah!"

So when my girlfriends who are over 40 and trying to lose 5,10, or even 20 pounds and ask "how did you DO it?" , "how do you KEEP IT OFF?", I tell them, hard work, Brazil Buttlift, constant activity, making magnificent food choices, and STRINGBEANS!

Just please don't use oil. If you must -- literally -- a teaspoon will do.  Salt, a smidgen, again, only if absolutely necessary.  Don't ruin the magic by fattening it up.  You will come to look at it as your saviour savory.   It will work for you if you work with it.  Add jalapenos, cumin, curry, oregano, sage, onion powder -- any spice will do.  Whatever works for you for additional taste.  I still prefer lemon overall.   Even if ultimately you give in to weakness, your stomach will still have been filled up by a nutritious, healthy substance, so you will STILL BE CONSUMING LESS.

If stringbeans don't ring your bell, then I suggest, asparagus, broccoli (VERY FILLING), spinach or lettuce.  Learn to love green!!!!!!

Yup! Opened and used. 2 for a filling dinner. So low calorie, quantity is not an issue.
pictures by Joanna Bonaro

JOANNA'S TASTY STRINGBEAN RECIPE:
2 Greenbean Steamers
1/4 cup part water and white wine
Garlic powder
Onion flakes
Red pepper powder or flakes
2 tblspn Lemon Juice or fresh squeezed lemon
Mix and enjoy!

If you are still hungry, 2-3 WASA crackers, with Weight Watchers Swiss Cheese - 2 wedges and even a glass of red or white wine.  Filling, healthy and low cal. 




My cancer fitness journey --
blogs 1,2,3,6,8,10 & 14

#24 SUMMER BEAUTY PRODUCTS 6/21/12

A FEW OF MY FAVORITE THINGS
Summer Beauty Products
No Sweat Beauty 

BLUE COLLAR BABES!!

Some beautifying products that won't break the budget.  Sometimes the basics and what grandma taught are the best.  Save your money in some places so you can splurge on the more important things.

BREAKOUTS ---- yes we still get them.   I have gone the toothpaste route, though the new whitening gels don't work at all.  Used dermatologist proscribed products where I need a prescription (not covered by insurance) or better yet, their pricey private label products. Yet, after much experimentation I highly recommend Mario Badescu's Drying Lotion.  It works like clay. Apply with a q-tip. Sleep. You will wakeup to problem solved. 

SOFT, SUPPLE HANDS  ----  Grandma always knew best. Tried and true through the ages. 1-3x a week. Use those old fashioned cotton white gloves, slather on your favorite hand cream, or my fave --- Vit. E oil gel and go about your day.  Do it a few hours before you do the laundry, remove and throw in the wash. Voila! Ready for next week!  Or sleep on it.  I cut out the fingertips so that I can go about my business.  Any beauty treatment for me must be easy.  Too involved and I lose interest.  Try it.  Compliments galore!   When gloves aren't an option --- Mario Badescu Hand Creme is the best hand creme I have ever used.  Use during day, near the kitchen sink, in your hand bag, even a sample in your winter parka.  Dry hands begone!

MANICURE TIP -- over 40! I would recommend shorter nails and paler colors.  Your fingers will look more elegant without the harsh color contrasts, along with elongating your fingers.  Longer nails start looking like claws and also seem so out of date and age you.  Oval shape as opposed to square is also much more attractive. Less boxy and blunt. Understatement is best. 

FOUNDATION FOR YOUR CLOSE-UP ----  again, there are a lot of products out there, but my favorite is MakeUp Forever  Liquid Foundation and SmashBox High Definition Primer.  Smooth on after moisturizing prior to foundation application.  Leaves your skin looking poreless and smooth.  Your close-ups never looked so good.

GEL EYEPENCILS  --  TARTE emphasEYES --  I first used these after getting eye lash extensions. (more on that in later blogs)  They don't have oils in them that will emulsify the glue from the extensions. They are super soft and so easy to use.  The color just glides on.  I stopped with the extensions (just for special occasions now) but kept on using these.  A little goes a long way. 

THOSE ARE THE SAVINGS BEAUTY TIPS, HERE IS THE SPLURGE!

FOR THAT VERY SPECIAL OCCASION ---  Well if its a big event day, I would recommend my favorite makeup artist and hair dresser/colorist from LA.  She comes to New York regularly and her work is featured on the covers of Vogue, Elle, Marie Claire, Brides, Vanidades and Cosmopolitan.  More caring and concern that you look magnificent on your big day you will never find.  Her name is Laly.  And she is magnificent, munificent and just plain fun.  You will look gorgeous and have a blast. 

She can be contacted at www.Ztalentgroup.com

Laly up front with Elizabetta Canalis

With these products and people as part of your arsenal, 

then you won't feel so bad - ever.

#22 HOT OVER 40! SURVIVING CANCER - I RUN FOR ME, MY MOTHER, FOR LIFE 5/12/12

More info click onto

IMDB www.imdb.me/joannabonaro

I AM WRITING THIS FOR MY 10 YEAR ANNIVERSARY AS A CANCER SURVIVOR-- MAY 25th, 2002.

 I survived cancer. But hated the way I looked. 

I gained my life. But lost my self-esteem. 

For 7 years. 

Then - * I got the woman in the mirror I liked to see back again. 

I am determined to make up for those 7 lost years.

In between, I learned that we all really need and want to feel beautiful.  That society puts way too much pressure on woman to be skeletal skinny and prepubescent and that there is a huge prejudice for any woman out there who is a size 8,10, 12 or 14. 

 I had a conundrum. 

I feel magnificent as a size 4, fat as a size 10 --- so what can my philosophy be? 

"Are you a hypocrite?", I asked myself.

No.

My viewpoint is:

I am not advocating skinny, nor am I condoning too much fat.  Neither is good - both are reflections of poor eating habits and perhaps poor exercise regimes.

I decided to propose & promote a positive outlook --- 

to seek health and happiness based upon your own values.  Not Vogues.

The thinking that "taking care of yourself" is important.

A tall building won't stay upright without a deep foundation and strong supports.  The same goes for your body- it needs proper food and exercise to excel.  Take care of the inside and the outside will take care of itself. Your spirit needs to wonder and feel light.  That's why we love mountain aeries.  Feeling close to the sky transports you.  You must have moments in life when you feel as if you can jubilantly soar through the Heavens.

 

The more  you take care of yourself, the better and lighter you feel. Your mind and emotions need to feel inspired.  Creating new ways of eating, moving and then yes adorning, create a sense of well-being.

LIVING IS ABOUT HAPPINESS.

 I want everyone to look and feel as pretty as they can, based upon there own comfort levels. Because I know, I know that no matter what any woman says, she wants to look and feel beautiful.

The reason why I am a lunatic in the gym?  

Because I can be.

Because I am still here. 

I could have been LONG gone. 

I am grabbing Life and not letting go. 

No one can stop me. No one can pull me down. 

I won't let myself and I won't let anyone else.  

AND NEITHER SHOULD YOU.


No matter where you are in your journey to look good and feel beautiful, remember that you are alive and able. 
Just start.  It will become a wondrous adventure full of surprises. You will surprise yourself the most. 
I guarantee it.

 Sure there are setbacks.  Life is about "dancing in the rain" afterall. Any rebirth symbolism involved water; a sprinkle or a plunge, drinking or sweating, it's all the same.

When I am in a class and basically moving at 100 mph an hour while others drop around me.  I am not showing off. 

I am exhilarating in the fact that I can move,
that I am alive.
 

I am not competing -
I am exhulting in movement and breath and life. 
I look in the mirror and I am grateful, incredulous and absolutely amazed.

Working out has become a celebration. 

So yes, I run  for my mom who has survived not one but TWO bouts of breast cancer, and I run for me. 

The scars on my body are my testiment, her testiment, every woman's testiment.  They say "I have survived." 

YES! I RUN FOR LIFE!

If  you are a cancer survivor I would love to hear from  you. 

   

If you would like to read some other blogs about cancer, my fitness and weight loss journey and getting your groove back with Brazil Buttlift 
see blogs #1,2,3,6,8,10 & 14

Fitness tip: Brazil Buttlift w/ Leandro Carvalho  www.leandrofitness.com

*thanks Leandro - I may not be a VS model, but who cares? I feel like a gorgeous one and at my age --- that is enough for me!

More info click onto



IMDB www.imdb.me/joannabonaro

#21 SISTERS, SISTERS --- TWINS NO LESS 4/20/12

SISTERS, SISTERS
 THERE WERE NEVER SUCH DEVOTED SISTERS!

My Twin

AREN'T I LUCKY? I HAVE A TWIN WHOM I ADORE AND WHO ADORES ME.  WE HAVE BEEN EVERY SIZE UNDER THE SUN AND NEVER AT THE SAME TIME....

TILL NOW. 

FINALLY THE JOY OF SHARING CLOTHES. 

I JUST FORCED HER TO BUY A CASHMERE MAX MARA BLACK COAT.   (well when I wrote this awhile back, not now.) She didn't know about this very chic, very Italian designer brand. 

I zoomed into the coat with my selective laser fashion eyes and told her,

"Put it on - it's you."  She was undecided.

  ~now note the sisterly psychology~

I put it it on instead and said, "If you don't buy this I will, I look gorgeous in it - so it's either me or you."  There was only 1 left in the size that we now both can wear.

"caring, sharing, every little think that we are wearing..."

She said, "ok sold."  Who needs a saleswoman when she has me?

VERY AUDREY. VERY CHIC. VERY EXPENSIVE.

IF NOT NOW WHEN? 

 YOU WORK HARD AT LIFE SO WHY NOT BUY A COAT THAT YOU FEEL LUXURIOUS, RICH AND GLAMOROUS IN?

WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR? 

I urge you to buy cashmere.  It keeps you warm, feels soft, is high quality and a classic style will last you for years.  

BLUE COLLAR GALS DO HAVE CASHMERE TASTES YOU KNOW.

WE MAY JUST HAVE TO WAIT FOR THE SALES. ONCE PURCHASED HOWEVER, WHO WILL EVER KNOW THE PRICE? 

  

We grew up loving "White Christmas", Rosemary Clooney (Ginny was Rosemary -  even though I could sing and Ginny could dance, and they are both blonde and we are not. Details, details. Pah!) and the song they sang --"Sisters, Sisters" -- with those wonderful feather boas! Hmm...

"When a certain gentleman arrived from Rome

She wore the dress, and I stayed home"

The good thing was that we NEVER , really never, liked the same guys.

  So that was not a problem  -- the problem, most noted in college, was if we actually liked the guy the other one was dating at all! It was usually, "Ugh, where'd you find that one! Get rid of him!" This was before they even met Dad!

There is no one as critical about the viability of prospective boyfriend than a twin.

"All kinds of weather, we stick together

The same in the rain and sun

Two different faces*, but in tight places

We think and we act as one" 

(*aside - how did Irving know we were fraternal? he wrote the song for us didn't he?
that's what mom said)

So true.  And now we can raid one another's closets. 

I've turned her onto Anthropologie. 

Danger ahead. 

Instead of two for one, it's now one for two!

FITNESS TIP:

My thing is Leandro Brazil Buttlift.  Her thing is Weight Watcher's. They both work. Go choose one. There is nothing more to say.  

#17 HOT OVER 40! MARILYN MONROE SIZZLE & SMARTS! 2/25/12

More info click onto



IMDB www.imdb.me/joannabonaro

Real vs Reel Beauty 
Yes! Marilyn knew the difference.

Sizzle + Smarts = 
Sensational  

 

My favorite Marilyn photo - with a BOOK!

Since this is a blog about beauty, image and the pressures society puts on women to look gorgeous no matter the circumstances, I harken back to Marilyn. Why? Well she did re-invent herself.  She was her own creation.  And creating one's own rennaissance whether it be through fitness or schooling, or relationships, or just a new pair of jeans is what this blog is about.  Creating a life and look that makes you happy,  gives one confidence, and authenticity - that is what I would hope for you. Because you are doing it for yourself, not to be selfish and narcissistic, but to be happy and healthy and fulfilled.
You deserve it.  
Marilyn was often misunderstood, however she was a brilliant actress and business woman.  A woman before her time who fought for her beliefs, and the rights of others.
I think if she could have continued to withstand the pressures of fame, stardom and her own personal demons, she would have been a true aging beauty.  
A role model on how to age with grace and style. 
With a face that moved and continued to move us too!

A true iconoclast. A forerunner. Trailblazer.

"For decades, irresponsible biographers like Norman Mailer have represented Marilyn Monroe as nothing more than weak, psychotic, junkie, nymphomaniac, idiot. I have tried to read her life in a different way. True, Marilyn was sometimes mired in the ideology of the past: she married men to gain an identity she wished for herself; she was over-reliant on her sexuality for success in her career. But, at the same time, she displayed real agency by divorcing three unsupportive husbands who interfered with her career and her self-esteem, by fighting for her modeling and film success, by continuing to perfect her art by taking acting classes long after she was a big star, by battling Darryl Zanuck to have more control over her own destiny, by starting her own production company, by buying her own home, even by jogging through service alleys, lifting weights, and wearing jeans. All of these things were accomplished six years before the first feminist protest at the Miss American Pageant in Atlantic City, New Jersey, and eight years before the First Congress to unite Women in New York."   (Excerpted from http://www.americanpopularculture.com/)

INSIGHT FOR THE DAY:

MARILYN JOGGED AND USED WEIGHTS BEFORE THE BOOM OF THE FITNESS CRAZE, GYMS, TRAINERS AND EXERCISE GURUS ---- SO FOLLOW HER EXAMPLE ---

YOU CAN TRANSFORM YOURSELF THROUGH DILIGENCE AND DEDICATION.  And no it ain't easy, however, eventually it will actually become fun.  Trust me. I know.
UPCOMING BLOGS ON VARIOUS EXERCISE STRATEGIES DURING SLUMPS, MALAISE & INJURIES.   

THANK YOU FOR YOUR INTEREST, COMMENTS, READERSHIP, CURIOSITY, CARING, SHARING.

CHOOSE HAPPINESS - EVEN DURING DURESS.
IT WON'T CHANGE THINGS ALOT, BUT PERHAPS, IT WILL CHANGE HOW YOU DEAL WITH IT.

if you are new to this blog and want some background on my philosophies and life after cancer IN A BIKINI   see blogs #1,2,3,6,8,10 &14

#13 HOT OVER 40! HAPPY HEALTHY HOT NEW YOU! 1/1/12

 TO DO LIST FOR A 2012 HAPPY, HEALTHY, HOT YOU!






 Celebrate yourself with a glass of champagne...







 Try something new just for the heck of it...





Say, "I love you" often...
Call your mother and compliment her...
Tell dad your proud of him...


 Eat really tasty food, you deserve the good stuff...
 

Take lots of long, long meandering walks...
Tell someone an unexpected truth that makes them smile...



Be especially kind to animals, children and the elderly...


Laugh as much as possible, as often as possible, and spend time with the ones who you care about the most...

Travel... explore... excite your mind...exercise your body.  LIVE!

#12 HOT OVER 40! SAY GOODBYE 12/30/11

Say goodbye...
Say goodbye to all your doubts and self-recriminations...
Say goodbye to your guilt, the late night food fests & self -prevarications...
Say goodbye to the 4th slice of pizza and the whoopie cookie binge...
Say goodbye to dressing room dread and summer clothing cringe...



Before the midnight bells ring 
 this is what I wish for you on January 1st 2012...
Joy ---   in your first breathe of the day as you open your eyes
Joy ---   as you feast on the sunshine and clouds and wonder of nature
Joy ---   as you plan all the activities that will make you smile.


Savor ---  your morning coffee
Savor ---  the first hug of the day from  your loved ones
Savor ---  every step forward, every smile, every kindness



   



    

    Keep ---  your wonder
    Keep ---  your hope
    Keep ---  your determination



 and think of all that you have and not what you want.


 You are your own creation
BREATHE DEEPLY   
Please, Do it all with Heart

HEALTHY TIP:   CRANBERRIES  Eating a heart healthy diet is one important step you can take to reduce your risk of heart disease & lower cholesterol. Cranberries contain no fat, no cholesterol, and very little sodium.   ( read entire article at www.uscranberries.com )

#9 HOT OVER 40! GLAM A LA LOMBARD

Do you suppose that being glamorous just applies to appearing exotic, smoky and slinky?  Wrong!  Garbo notwithstanding ---

I would like to take a page from another siren's book --

the Screwball Goddess herself. Carole Lombard. 

Take a peak at her picture to your left and tell me she didn't rival Garbo in glamour.  

During Hollywood's Heyday, who did she catch?

None other than Mr. Sigh himself - Clark Gable. 

Clark and Carole were known as the Golden Couple during the Golden Age of Hollywood.

Photo from www.fanpix.net/carolelombard

A LESSON IN GOOFBALL GLAMOUR - VIA CAROLE

Many of you may be surprised to learn that Carole was in a car accident where her face was seriously scarred.  As a result of her "loss of looks" she was dropped by Fox Studios and her career appeared to be over.  Yet this seemingly cataclysmic marring of her face --- actually proved to be the making of the screwball girl. 

It was "the beginning," said a friend, "of her philosophy, her inner life.  For she began to laugh at herself-and she went on laughing at herself for as long as she lived." 

Lombard's humor came down to a profound irreverence --- and the need to tweak convention wherever she saw it.  She couldn't resist poking fun at those who took themselves too seriously.  When a movie of Gable's bombed everywhere but China, she dropped aerial leaflets printed with, "Fifty Million Chinamen Can't Be Wrong!" 

She teased Gable about his frugality, his large ears, and "the greater popularity of Shirley Temple."  (If you do not know who Shirley is... continue eating your Animal Crackers and stop reading this blog.) 

Lombard's screwball view helped him laugh at the world.                                                         Photo from www.feminine-flower.tumblr.com

She also had scores of what she termed, "sexy friendships"  with lots of the male leading stars of the day.  But she always remained true and faithful to Clark. 

Life magazine noted,  "her entry on a set often occasions so many greetings from prop men, mechanics, assistant directors, and electricians, that the uproar sounds like a reunion between Tarzan and his monkeys."  (young starlets take note)

During the shooting of From Heaven to Hell, Lombard shivered in a summer dress in the middle of January.  "All right you warm, bloody bastards," she joked,  "every one of you down to your jockey shorts!"  THEY STRIPPED.

Now, if you are not the life of the party or knock down funny (like me) you can still develop a sense of humor through your way of looking at the world.* 

GLAM A LA LOMBARD:

Carole Lombard On Her Beauty:
 “You ought to see the map for my face in the Makeup Department. It looks like a landscape of the moon.”
Carole Lombard On Being A Glamour Girl:
 “Personally, I resent being tagged ‘glamour girl.’ It’s such an absurd, extravagant label. It implies so much that I’m not.”

Carole Lombard On Being A Style Queen:

“I can’t imagine a duller fate than being the best dressed woman in reality. When I want to do something I don’t pause to contemplate whether I’m exquisitely gowned. I want to live, not pose!”

Carole Lombard On Humor:

“ The Cardinal Virtue ... Is a sense of humor,” says Carole. “Do you laugh in the right places? Then, you’ll get along, in fair weather or foul. Humor is nothing less than a sense of the fitness of things. Something that’s out of proportion, like an inflated ego, should strike you funny, particularly if it’s your own inflated ego. Otherwise you are pathetic and quite hopeless.”

Photo from www.seattletimes.nwsource.com

GOOFY GLAMOUR TIP
Look for the "funny in the fiasco" and you will have learned a lesson in Lombard's book. A sense of self-deprecation and an awareness of the absurdity in everyday living will work wonders.

So, laugh easily, laugh often and you'll be happier --- those laugh lines will start looking very good and be a reflection of both your outer and inner happiness. I would bet a chip or two that the admiring male next to you will think so too.

He will only have eyes for you.

Photo from www.goldenagedames.wordpress.com

*Royal Blue ink signifies complete excerpts from, Simply Irresistible by Ellen T. White

PS  I think the "Follow" favicon button is working now.  If you have a google account just click.  Or easily create a google account.   Otherwise you can follow me via email,  No spam or sales.
Even though this is a continuing problem - for I have heard from many of you  --- I want to thank all my readers, over 600 in just 3 months from the U.S., United Kingdom, Canada, Italy, Finland, Saudi Arabia, Chile, Germany, Jordan, India, Denmark, Malaysia, Egypt, Peru, Denmark, Hungary and the Netherlands for your continued support.  I hope I am inspiring/ helping you and giving you some calorie free "food for thought," along with a positive healthy inner sense of beauty and well-being.
 Have a great-glam day!  

#8 HOT OVER 40! CARROTS, CRUNCHES & MUNCHIES

FLAT STOMACH.   Two words that can send frissons of fear into the female heart. 
Our minds and souls become paralysed.  Thoughts, usually filled with guilt about last night's dessert, swell your brain.  Those two words can cause an explosion of voices and such fevered emotion  that onlookers, or foreign travelers, would swear a duel might imminently ensue.  It can't - we are too busy asphyxiating ourselves holding in our stomachs.
Well, don't fear. Help is on the way.  
You know how I have mentioned that orange and green are my fashion color enemies? 

Well , in food choices they are just golden. 

I have discovered my munchie food friends and none of them are fried.

I have to admit that I suffer from mandible motion mania or munchie madness. 
In other words. I have a constant need to chew and swallow food while I am reading (which is quite often, book-worm that I am), watching TV (usually only Sunday nights at 9), studying, (the times vary widely), writing (such as this very moment). 
These are activities, keep in mind, where one is stationery, either lying down or sitting, 

 I found this very bad habit impossible to control until I decided that I wasn't going to tame it, just change it - and re-thought what type of snacking  I would use.  In the past, crackers and cereal were my chew of choice.  I used to pat myself on the back for not opting for the "bad" choice of cookies or ice cream. What greater fool was I! 

My healthy drugs, er I mean foods, of choice, (though now I do crave them - oh joy!)  ensure that I get the crunch and chew satisfaction that I must have,  along with a feeling of satiety (Merriam Webster definition 1 not 2 ) without the guilt of calories and a swollen stomach.

(NOTE - ALL ARE RAW - NOT COOKED - REMEMBER THESE ARE GRAB AND CHEW WHILE ENGAGING IN SEDENTARY ACTIVITIES - AN OXYMORON I KNOW)

5  CRUNCHIE MUNCHIES

CARROTS- fiber, Vitamins A & C                                     One cup= approx 50 cal.
JICAMA -potassium and Vitamin C                                   One cup = approx 45 cal.
RED,ORANGE & YELLOW PEPPERS -                           One cup =approx  30 cal. 
   lots of Vitamin C in all 3 though red is best  
ROMAINE LETTUCE                                                       Doesn't matter - so few cal.
JALAPENO PEPPERS - capsaicin - great for arthritis       Can you even eat one cup?
                                       go slow on this one.

Yes there are lots of other often recommended veggies such as celery, which I found boring,  broccoli - which I love cooked or raw, but if munching in public can create "green teeth smile" so be warned.  I choose the above because these items can be purchased pre-washed and pre-sliced so that it is all easy-peazy lazy lady-like. 

EXERCISE TIP:  Stomach exercises work as long as you concentrate on the specific area and lift and lower while always keeping the muscle tensed.  If you do them quickly, just lifting your head and not your shoulders,  and/or  fully release your muscle upon lowering you are accomplishing very little and will not see the results as quickly. 
Also, in order to see results, and maintain them, you should be doing crunches, upper and lower along with oblique crunches ideally 4-6x a week.  You want even quicker results?  Use a stability ball -  or an incline bench - or hold a 5 lb. dumbbell on your upper chest - work it!

EXTRA FLAT TUMMY TIP:   don't drink your calories gals,  I mean soda, or frozen margaritas .  A complete waste on your waist.  That's where those calories go - right to your middle.  Choose water with lemon instead.  Sparkly if you need the fizz. (like me)  My on-the-go favorite is  Vitamin Water ZERO - Mixed Berry.

 I know I sound like a broken record but go to http://www.leandrofitness.com/ for Brazil Tummy Tuck exercises.  He is the fitness trainer not I.  I am only a convert,  who tried it and found it to be true - oh and my waist is the same as when I was 20.  So it works if you work it.

JUST TO GET THINGS SORTED:  I would like to re-confirm that I am simply a woman who is making recommendations based upon my own experiences.  I am sharing what worked for me after much experimentation.  This blog is aimed to empower women on how to feel beautiful and take control of their bodies, and increase self-image and self-satisfaction levels in order to experience REAL not "reel" beauty.  I am  hoping that you are relating to a woman who is just like you  - a woman from the neighborhood who doesn't have tons of money for trainers, food deliveries, cosmetic surgery or any of those other not mentioned "beauty secret helpers"  that create tabloid goddesses. 
 If you have any serious health conditions or allergies kindly review any of these suggestions first with your doctor. 

#7 HOT OVER 40! FROM RED CARPET TO HILARITY PART 2 - or The Ecstasy then the Agony (#7)

We arrive in Dallas.  I know I am in the Lone Star State because as we are driving to the hotel we see two billboards. One states,  "GOD IS OUR SALVATION".  About 3 seconds later "GUN SHOW - CASH ACCEPTED". 

We arrive at our hotel, and find we have been upgraded to a suite. Sweet!  Debate whether to partake of some Texas chili but decide a good nights sleep is better.  Plus, I am not really eating anything that is not steamed or green until after the big event.  Instead, I  fill up on chamomile tea with lemon. 

I know - a poor second - but I told you I would be honest. 

(Do you remember the pic of Hillary Swank after she won the Oscar?  You don't think she did this too?  She was snarfing down a Big Mac n Cheese with gusto.  I love her for her refreshing honesty and fierce talent.)

Next day.  Wake up to warm sunshine and birds singing.  It was snowing back in New York about then, so I savor the  toasty rays saying to myself,  " another good sign." 
Like Catherine De Medici I am superstitious that way. 
Only she had visions and unfortunately I don't.
It might have proven useful later in the day. 
I layout the dress (which had its own suitcase - yup the entire suitcase had just one dress in it along with about 500 reams of tissue paper and crinkled dry cleaning plastic.) 
Put out the makeup.  Now, the makeup artist was bringing everything however, I am also the type who ALWAYS COMES PREPARED.  So I brought all of my "on camera hi-def" makeup --- in case we had a difference of opinion. 
As it turns out the makeup artist was an absolute angel along with being a great instructor on how one puts on false eyelashes.  A skill I have yet to attain.  She applies excessive eye makeup - up close this doesn't look natural, but does wonders when under bright lights. 
One must learn these things.
I had some slight misgivings on the hair-do when she teased it so that I looked like a raven colony had decided to nest, but she assuaged my doubts by stating, "by the time you get there it will have settled down."  My fleeting thought was, "hope the chicks are fed by then."

After she left it was time to put on the dress. 
A slight nervous breakdown occurred when the dress that fit perfectly in New York, suddenly would not zip up the back.  Hubby proved useless in this matter.  I think hubbies are usually useless in this matter of stuck zippers, but the only female I knew had just left so I was having a minor sweat attack along with worrying about the hair.  However, after15 minutes and endless attempts, the recalcitrant zipper decided to "play nice." Whew. 
Reapply deodorant.... carefully.   Then, shoes (which have been sanded on bottom so no slipping occurs) gold jewelry (not from Cartier but from Italy),  bag (remember to bring ID and cash plus I-phone -- on vibrate please , no room for a brush but the cement hairspray hopefully will hold out.)
Look in the mirror and   .......   THE TRANSFORMATION HAS BEEN ACHIEVED!
Like Maria in "West Side Story"  I feel pretty.  Hallelujah! 
I am ready with time to spare. 
Oh and in between hubby got dressed too.  But who really cared about that? Just kidding.  He looked very handsome. My leading man.

The phone vibrates.  It's the director.  "Don't worry, but the car that is coming to pick you up is running about 20 minutes late.  We can't arrive together. But the event is 5 minutes away so you should be OK.  We won't walk without you." 
20 minutes goes by.  No one arrives.  I call and get voicemail.  GREAT.
Finally another call.  "He is stuck in traffic.  He will be another 10 minutes." 
We were supposed to have been there by now.  After all this preparation I am going to miss the entire thing.
Another 15 minutes.  The anti-perspirant has stopped working. Voicemail. Again.
What to do? What to do?  Should I just hike up my dress and run over? 
(I told you how self-sufficient I can be. Plus I'm fit, remember?)
Finally, a call, "he should be there."  I am exhausted and the event is yet to happen.
I am thinking,  "can't something go smoothly, just once?"  Hubby about to give me a mini-massage and I scream, "watch the hair, watch the hair!"  Ah love.

We arrive. 
It looks exactly as one expects it too.  Lots of spectators milling about.  Lots and lots of press and photographers. Everyone is smiling. You can tell just by looking for the most part, who are the actors versus the directors, writers and producers.  The actors are always dressed and coiffed to the hilt.  It's just the way it is.  Plus their teeth are always so startlingly white. 
(Note to self: You forgot to doooooo thaaaaat! - 95% wattage will have to suffice)  
My director (whom I adore)  and executive producers look splendid and beautiful and radiant. 
And we are all smiling. 
We are assigned a handler.  This individual will escort us through the aisle leading up to the stage at our appointed time.  As we progress forward, people are waving hello and kissing the air and saying things like, "Let's meet for drinks later."  It's hard to hear anything.  I think I am being told to talk about the "female" slant of this film but can't really hear.  And now it's our turn.  The executive producer makes sure the film's poster is placed just so. 
It's time to step on the carpet which is a rich deep red.  
I give myself a moment to take it all in and "own it."  
I am not nervous at all.  In fact, I plan to have a ball. 
The camera's flash, light's pop everywhere, and as we progress down the stage we are stopped by reporters.  My lovely director introduces me as coming "all the way from New York City" which is touching, and the reporter looks at me and declares after having asked me about my role in the film, "How can you be from New York? You are so nice!"  I laughed at that and said, "It's hard not to be when one is in Texas. I think I will move here!"  I think she liked that. 
And so it went.  We were interviewed by the press for both print and TV and web and posed and smiled and laughed for about 45 minutes.  Ann -Margaret even interrupted me.  (It's okay to be cut off  by a legend.) 
Then it was over. Just like that. 
It was a piece of cake and I had a grand old time.  
I couldn't believe that I was even asked "who I wore." Hilarious.

Film premieres. Kiss, kiss, hug, hug.  Let's change and meet for drinks -----   Remember that dear reader!  You think I've already described the agony? HA!
We all part.  Hubby and I return to hotel suite.   Have about an hour and a half to kill before going out again.  Shower, change, very casual, low-key no pressure now.  Lost an eyelash in bathroom anyway. Impossible to locate. Hair back to raven color instead of avian gathering.  
Relaxing when hubby comes from living room to bedroom where I am resting, holding his stomach.  He lies down on bed and says.  "I don't feel so well." 
Not the least bit concerned I say - "What do you mean?" 
"My stomach  hurts."  (His stomach always hurts.)
"It's probably just gas, roll around on the bed a bit," I state unsympathetically. 
I am thinking, "what now, we have to go out soon!"
He moves around for about 5 minutes. Then doubles over and breaks out in a cold sweat.
"I am really in pain all of a sudden."  Jeez.
"Did you eat something since we came back?"  I am still not buying into this.
"No and I am really in pain.  Do you think I should go to the emergency room?"
This gets my attention. 
My husband would NEVER, EVER ASK ME if he should go to any emergency room. 
"You  would never, ever ask me if I think you should go to the emergency room!" I cry.
"Are you having an appendix attack?" 
We prod and poke.  His pain is kind of on the side of his waist.  No organ we can remember being there. 
"Are you sure you didn't eat something?"  "Are you having a heart attack?"
Even though the pain is located on his  right side and below the rib cage, I am starting now to worry. Big time.
He can't stand up but says,   "Maybe it will subside. After all we are going home tomorrow."
"If you are even thinking of an emergency room it means you should go. You can't have this happening on the plane. And what are you talking about anyway? You are white as newly bleached teeth and sweat is pouring off of you!" 
I pick up the phone to the receptionist. 
"My husband has become desperately ill.  Where is the nearest hospital?"
Being Texan, they were all so wonderful and helpful. Immediately.  No questions or attitudes.
Maybe we should move here.

We wind up at Baylor Hospital emergency room. 
Needless to say, an emergency room in downtown Dallas at midnight is as far away from a red carpet crowd as can be.  Plus their computer system went down resulting in  a 3 hour delay because processing all the incoming patients has to be done manually.  No one is used to doing that anymore. 
We sit in plastic chairs surrounded by moaning, suffering, bleeding, a screeching cat fight over a pimp, ( I kid you not) , a man who had beige bugs crawling over him, (is this a vision?!?) and mayhem until he is finally admitted at 4:15 AM. 
The admitting nurse asks us if we are willing to pay a $100 charge and is surprised when we say "yes." 
It appears that no one ever does.
Blood work, x-rays, and c-scans later, the doctor comes in to tell us - "Kidney Stones."
??!!!**##??!!!!!
Incredible. 
My husband looks at me, and with a twinkle in his eye restored, now that he is on mega-pain killers, and quips, "Well it's a good thing this didn't happen earlier.  You would have left me at the emergency room door. And I would have wanted you to. "  I say, "You are absolutely right, but I would have come back as soon as  it was all over."  Ah,  devotion.

We got back to the hotel at 6:30 AM.  And crashed.  Then hopped on a plane home by 4pm.

I think all the partying was over by then.  I didn't bother to check.  I didn't care.  I had my moment and more importantly, my husband by my side. 

So while everyone thinks I was living it up and leading such a glamorous life....

I say, "it's the grits that count."   Without love, it ain't much.  Ah Amore.  A-men.

BEAUTY TIP  --    studies show that wearing red increases athletic performance and may lead to more confidence. It may even make you push harder while working out!

Next.....  Carrots, Crunches, and Munchies

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