#32 BRAZILBUTTLIFT ON QVC - Watch how it works! 9/12/12

More info click onto     IMDB www.imdb.me/joannabonaro

LET ME INTRODUCE YOU!....

AND YOU'LL HAVE A REAL GOOD TIME,

YOU'LL SEE,

YOU'LL.

HAVE. 

A REAL GOOD TIME.

(yes channeling Natalie)

 

 

http://www.qvc.com/Brazil-ButtLift-Lower-Body-Workout-with-3-DVD-%26-3-Booty-Bands.product.F05456.html

HELLO LADIES!  SO WHY THE CAPS? 

I SHOUT IT OUT ---
BECAUSE I KNOW WHAT IT IS LIKE TO BE MADE TO FEEL INVISABLE ----
AND I DON'T WANT YOU TO FEEL THAT WAY AT ALL...
OR EVER AGAIN.

I prefer the lady like term - INVINCIBLE 

ULTIMATELY ITS NOT ABOUT SIZE --- IT'S ABOUT FEELING GOOD ABOUT YOURSELF.

AND STAYING HEALTHY. 

ITS NOT ABOUT VANITY --

ITS FIRST AND FOREMOST  ABOUT YOUR MENTAL AND EMOTIONAL HEALTH ....

THE PHYSICAL BENEFITS ARE THE ICING ON THE CAKE OF YOUR LIFE.  

I AM TALKING ABOUT FEELING ---   JOY.

SO TAKE A CHANCE.

I GAIN NO MONETARY VALUE FROM THIS - ZILCH. 

I JUST WANT TO SHARE WHAT WORKED FOR ME.   

GET BACK YOUR STRENGTH, YOUR INNER BEAUTY & THE CONFIDENT WOMAN IN THE MIRROR. 

 

I WANT YOU TO WAKE UP AND FEEL ON FIRE EVERY SINGLE DAY....

 

-----FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE.   

http://www.qvc.com/Brazil-ButtLift-Lower-Body-Workout-with-3-DVD-%26-3-Booty-Bands.product.F05456.html

If you have questions, or concerns feel free to ask me.  I am on FB and also IMDB. I will advise you to the best of my experiences and my abilities.    I wish you LOVE AND GREAT JOY.   JOANNA



More info click onto



IMDB www.imdb.me/joannabonaro




 

#19 HOT OVER 40! PLAN B for BLUE COLLAR BABES 3/15/12

OK SO YOU ARE AN INJURED HOTTIE -

NOW WHAT DO YOU DO?

PLAN A   That's for the highly blessed, the super rich, or those who have great publicity agents and personal trainers. 

PLAN B  -  that's for our special group: BLUE COLLAR BABES. I used to bemoan this, however, I have learned that when life throws us curves, if we love them on our bodies, then we love them anywhere else, too.

WHEN PLAN A GOES ARRAY

I was injured recently while intensely training for a 1/2 Marathon.  Damn!  What to do? What to do?  All my fitness goals for the new year de-railed.  Doctors orders. After bemoaning my fate, I came up with some alternative exercise options even though I did have to give up the marathon in April.  

Plan A ---   running 5-6 miles 5x a week, gradually adding 2 miles a week

                    until I achieved 12 miles with ease.

My fave Brazil Buttlift classes 3x a week for 2 hours each

                   time; along with free weight training on alternating days.

                   Trampoline 2x a week just when watching TV. And anything

                    else I could come up with.  Eating for intense training.

then re-opened old injuries on elbow, shoulder, bicep, neck, and hip.

SOOOOOO ~~~

PLAN B - BE A BLUE COLLAR BABE HOTTIE EVEN WHEN INJURED

Plan B  ---  water aerobics 1x week,  elliptic 30 min. 3x (no arms) on
                   a low incline and effort (Level 5-9 not  12-15), lower body

                   weight machine training 2x a week. Stairs (19 floors) also very long, hilly 2-4 mile walks.  Eating Heaps of steamed broccolli and stringbeans.

Goal -- Healing... then....getting ripped bikini season of course! 

A Blue Collar Babe Over 40,50 or even 60 (Helen Mirren is an icon!) - wears bikini's proudly.  

You can do it. Transforming is a specialty of mine.  I believe in you.

(Don't worry we will be in touch for that - failure is not an option)

I saw this card in the store and had to pick it up -- it encapsulates this philosophy:

Life is all about how you handle plan B.

by Suzy Toronto

#22 HOT OVER 40! SURVIVING CANCER - I RUN FOR ME, MY MOTHER, FOR LIFE 5/12/12

More info click onto

IMDB www.imdb.me/joannabonaro

I AM WRITING THIS FOR MY 10 YEAR ANNIVERSARY AS A CANCER SURVIVOR-- MAY 25th, 2002.

 I survived cancer. But hated the way I looked. 

I gained my life. But lost my self-esteem. 

For 7 years. 

Then - * I got the woman in the mirror I liked to see back again. 

I am determined to make up for those 7 lost years.

In between, I learned that we all really need and want to feel beautiful.  That society puts way too much pressure on woman to be skeletal skinny and prepubescent and that there is a huge prejudice for any woman out there who is a size 8,10, 12 or 14. 

 I had a conundrum. 

I feel magnificent as a size 4, fat as a size 10 --- so what can my philosophy be? 

"Are you a hypocrite?", I asked myself.

No.

My viewpoint is:

I am not advocating skinny, nor am I condoning too much fat.  Neither is good - both are reflections of poor eating habits and perhaps poor exercise regimes.

I decided to propose & promote a positive outlook --- 

to seek health and happiness based upon your own values.  Not Vogues.

The thinking that "taking care of yourself" is important.

A tall building won't stay upright without a deep foundation and strong supports.  The same goes for your body- it needs proper food and exercise to excel.  Take care of the inside and the outside will take care of itself. Your spirit needs to wonder and feel light.  That's why we love mountain aeries.  Feeling close to the sky transports you.  You must have moments in life when you feel as if you can jubilantly soar through the Heavens.

 

The more  you take care of yourself, the better and lighter you feel. Your mind and emotions need to feel inspired.  Creating new ways of eating, moving and then yes adorning, create a sense of well-being.

LIVING IS ABOUT HAPPINESS.

 I want everyone to look and feel as pretty as they can, based upon there own comfort levels. Because I know, I know that no matter what any woman says, she wants to look and feel beautiful.

The reason why I am a lunatic in the gym?  

Because I can be.

Because I am still here. 

I could have been LONG gone. 

I am grabbing Life and not letting go. 

No one can stop me. No one can pull me down. 

I won't let myself and I won't let anyone else.  

AND NEITHER SHOULD YOU.


No matter where you are in your journey to look good and feel beautiful, remember that you are alive and able. 
Just start.  It will become a wondrous adventure full of surprises. You will surprise yourself the most. 
I guarantee it.

 Sure there are setbacks.  Life is about "dancing in the rain" afterall. Any rebirth symbolism involved water; a sprinkle or a plunge, drinking or sweating, it's all the same.

When I am in a class and basically moving at 100 mph an hour while others drop around me.  I am not showing off. 

I am exhilarating in the fact that I can move,
that I am alive.
 

I am not competing -
I am exhulting in movement and breath and life. 
I look in the mirror and I am grateful, incredulous and absolutely amazed.

Working out has become a celebration. 

So yes, I run  for my mom who has survived not one but TWO bouts of breast cancer, and I run for me. 

The scars on my body are my testiment, her testiment, every woman's testiment.  They say "I have survived." 

YES! I RUN FOR LIFE!

If  you are a cancer survivor I would love to hear from  you. 

   

If you would like to read some other blogs about cancer, my fitness and weight loss journey and getting your groove back with Brazil Buttlift 
see blogs #1,2,3,6,8,10 & 14

Fitness tip: Brazil Buttlift w/ Leandro Carvalho  www.leandrofitness.com

*thanks Leandro - I may not be a VS model, but who cares? I feel like a gorgeous one and at my age --- that is enough for me!

More info click onto



IMDB www.imdb.me/joannabonaro

#13 HOT OVER 40! HAPPY HEALTHY HOT NEW YOU! 1/1/12

 TO DO LIST FOR A 2012 HAPPY, HEALTHY, HOT YOU!






 Celebrate yourself with a glass of champagne...







 Try something new just for the heck of it...





Say, "I love you" often...
Call your mother and compliment her...
Tell dad your proud of him...


 Eat really tasty food, you deserve the good stuff...
 

Take lots of long, long meandering walks...
Tell someone an unexpected truth that makes them smile...



Be especially kind to animals, children and the elderly...


Laugh as much as possible, as often as possible, and spend time with the ones who you care about the most...

Travel... explore... excite your mind...exercise your body.  LIVE!

#9 HOT OVER 40! GLAM A LA LOMBARD

Do you suppose that being glamorous just applies to appearing exotic, smoky and slinky?  Wrong!  Garbo notwithstanding ---

I would like to take a page from another siren's book --

the Screwball Goddess herself. Carole Lombard. 

Take a peak at her picture to your left and tell me she didn't rival Garbo in glamour.  

During Hollywood's Heyday, who did she catch?

None other than Mr. Sigh himself - Clark Gable. 

Clark and Carole were known as the Golden Couple during the Golden Age of Hollywood.

Photo from www.fanpix.net/carolelombard

A LESSON IN GOOFBALL GLAMOUR - VIA CAROLE

Many of you may be surprised to learn that Carole was in a car accident where her face was seriously scarred.  As a result of her "loss of looks" she was dropped by Fox Studios and her career appeared to be over.  Yet this seemingly cataclysmic marring of her face --- actually proved to be the making of the screwball girl. 

It was "the beginning," said a friend, "of her philosophy, her inner life.  For she began to laugh at herself-and she went on laughing at herself for as long as she lived." 

Lombard's humor came down to a profound irreverence --- and the need to tweak convention wherever she saw it.  She couldn't resist poking fun at those who took themselves too seriously.  When a movie of Gable's bombed everywhere but China, she dropped aerial leaflets printed with, "Fifty Million Chinamen Can't Be Wrong!" 

She teased Gable about his frugality, his large ears, and "the greater popularity of Shirley Temple."  (If you do not know who Shirley is... continue eating your Animal Crackers and stop reading this blog.) 

Lombard's screwball view helped him laugh at the world.                                                         Photo from www.feminine-flower.tumblr.com

She also had scores of what she termed, "sexy friendships"  with lots of the male leading stars of the day.  But she always remained true and faithful to Clark. 

Life magazine noted,  "her entry on a set often occasions so many greetings from prop men, mechanics, assistant directors, and electricians, that the uproar sounds like a reunion between Tarzan and his monkeys."  (young starlets take note)

During the shooting of From Heaven to Hell, Lombard shivered in a summer dress in the middle of January.  "All right you warm, bloody bastards," she joked,  "every one of you down to your jockey shorts!"  THEY STRIPPED.

Now, if you are not the life of the party or knock down funny (like me) you can still develop a sense of humor through your way of looking at the world.* 

GLAM A LA LOMBARD:

Carole Lombard On Her Beauty:
 “You ought to see the map for my face in the Makeup Department. It looks like a landscape of the moon.”
Carole Lombard On Being A Glamour Girl:
 “Personally, I resent being tagged ‘glamour girl.’ It’s such an absurd, extravagant label. It implies so much that I’m not.”

Carole Lombard On Being A Style Queen:

“I can’t imagine a duller fate than being the best dressed woman in reality. When I want to do something I don’t pause to contemplate whether I’m exquisitely gowned. I want to live, not pose!”

Carole Lombard On Humor:

“ The Cardinal Virtue ... Is a sense of humor,” says Carole. “Do you laugh in the right places? Then, you’ll get along, in fair weather or foul. Humor is nothing less than a sense of the fitness of things. Something that’s out of proportion, like an inflated ego, should strike you funny, particularly if it’s your own inflated ego. Otherwise you are pathetic and quite hopeless.”

Photo from www.seattletimes.nwsource.com

GOOFY GLAMOUR TIP
Look for the "funny in the fiasco" and you will have learned a lesson in Lombard's book. A sense of self-deprecation and an awareness of the absurdity in everyday living will work wonders.

So, laugh easily, laugh often and you'll be happier --- those laugh lines will start looking very good and be a reflection of both your outer and inner happiness. I would bet a chip or two that the admiring male next to you will think so too.

He will only have eyes for you.

Photo from www.goldenagedames.wordpress.com

*Royal Blue ink signifies complete excerpts from, Simply Irresistible by Ellen T. White

PS  I think the "Follow" favicon button is working now.  If you have a google account just click.  Or easily create a google account.   Otherwise you can follow me via email,  No spam or sales.
Even though this is a continuing problem - for I have heard from many of you  --- I want to thank all my readers, over 600 in just 3 months from the U.S., United Kingdom, Canada, Italy, Finland, Saudi Arabia, Chile, Germany, Jordan, India, Denmark, Malaysia, Egypt, Peru, Denmark, Hungary and the Netherlands for your continued support.  I hope I am inspiring/ helping you and giving you some calorie free "food for thought," along with a positive healthy inner sense of beauty and well-being.
 Have a great-glam day!  

#8 HOT OVER 40! CARROTS, CRUNCHES & MUNCHIES

FLAT STOMACH.   Two words that can send frissons of fear into the female heart. 
Our minds and souls become paralysed.  Thoughts, usually filled with guilt about last night's dessert, swell your brain.  Those two words can cause an explosion of voices and such fevered emotion  that onlookers, or foreign travelers, would swear a duel might imminently ensue.  It can't - we are too busy asphyxiating ourselves holding in our stomachs.
Well, don't fear. Help is on the way.  
You know how I have mentioned that orange and green are my fashion color enemies? 

Well , in food choices they are just golden. 

I have discovered my munchie food friends and none of them are fried.

I have to admit that I suffer from mandible motion mania or munchie madness. 
In other words. I have a constant need to chew and swallow food while I am reading (which is quite often, book-worm that I am), watching TV (usually only Sunday nights at 9), studying, (the times vary widely), writing (such as this very moment). 
These are activities, keep in mind, where one is stationery, either lying down or sitting, 

 I found this very bad habit impossible to control until I decided that I wasn't going to tame it, just change it - and re-thought what type of snacking  I would use.  In the past, crackers and cereal were my chew of choice.  I used to pat myself on the back for not opting for the "bad" choice of cookies or ice cream. What greater fool was I! 

My healthy drugs, er I mean foods, of choice, (though now I do crave them - oh joy!)  ensure that I get the crunch and chew satisfaction that I must have,  along with a feeling of satiety (Merriam Webster definition 1 not 2 ) without the guilt of calories and a swollen stomach.

(NOTE - ALL ARE RAW - NOT COOKED - REMEMBER THESE ARE GRAB AND CHEW WHILE ENGAGING IN SEDENTARY ACTIVITIES - AN OXYMORON I KNOW)

5  CRUNCHIE MUNCHIES

CARROTS- fiber, Vitamins A & C                                     One cup= approx 50 cal.
JICAMA -potassium and Vitamin C                                   One cup = approx 45 cal.
RED,ORANGE & YELLOW PEPPERS -                           One cup =approx  30 cal. 
   lots of Vitamin C in all 3 though red is best  
ROMAINE LETTUCE                                                       Doesn't matter - so few cal.
JALAPENO PEPPERS - capsaicin - great for arthritis       Can you even eat one cup?
                                       go slow on this one.

Yes there are lots of other often recommended veggies such as celery, which I found boring,  broccoli - which I love cooked or raw, but if munching in public can create "green teeth smile" so be warned.  I choose the above because these items can be purchased pre-washed and pre-sliced so that it is all easy-peazy lazy lady-like. 

EXERCISE TIP:  Stomach exercises work as long as you concentrate on the specific area and lift and lower while always keeping the muscle tensed.  If you do them quickly, just lifting your head and not your shoulders,  and/or  fully release your muscle upon lowering you are accomplishing very little and will not see the results as quickly. 
Also, in order to see results, and maintain them, you should be doing crunches, upper and lower along with oblique crunches ideally 4-6x a week.  You want even quicker results?  Use a stability ball -  or an incline bench - or hold a 5 lb. dumbbell on your upper chest - work it!

EXTRA FLAT TUMMY TIP:   don't drink your calories gals,  I mean soda, or frozen margaritas .  A complete waste on your waist.  That's where those calories go - right to your middle.  Choose water with lemon instead.  Sparkly if you need the fizz. (like me)  My on-the-go favorite is  Vitamin Water ZERO - Mixed Berry.

 I know I sound like a broken record but go to http://www.leandrofitness.com/ for Brazil Tummy Tuck exercises.  He is the fitness trainer not I.  I am only a convert,  who tried it and found it to be true - oh and my waist is the same as when I was 20.  So it works if you work it.

JUST TO GET THINGS SORTED:  I would like to re-confirm that I am simply a woman who is making recommendations based upon my own experiences.  I am sharing what worked for me after much experimentation.  This blog is aimed to empower women on how to feel beautiful and take control of their bodies, and increase self-image and self-satisfaction levels in order to experience REAL not "reel" beauty.  I am  hoping that you are relating to a woman who is just like you  - a woman from the neighborhood who doesn't have tons of money for trainers, food deliveries, cosmetic surgery or any of those other not mentioned "beauty secret helpers"  that create tabloid goddesses. 
 If you have any serious health conditions or allergies kindly review any of these suggestions first with your doctor. 

#7 HOT OVER 40! FROM RED CARPET TO HILARITY PART 2 - or The Ecstasy then the Agony (#7)

We arrive in Dallas.  I know I am in the Lone Star State because as we are driving to the hotel we see two billboards. One states,  "GOD IS OUR SALVATION".  About 3 seconds later "GUN SHOW - CASH ACCEPTED". 

We arrive at our hotel, and find we have been upgraded to a suite. Sweet!  Debate whether to partake of some Texas chili but decide a good nights sleep is better.  Plus, I am not really eating anything that is not steamed or green until after the big event.  Instead, I  fill up on chamomile tea with lemon. 

I know - a poor second - but I told you I would be honest. 

(Do you remember the pic of Hillary Swank after she won the Oscar?  You don't think she did this too?  She was snarfing down a Big Mac n Cheese with gusto.  I love her for her refreshing honesty and fierce talent.)

Next day.  Wake up to warm sunshine and birds singing.  It was snowing back in New York about then, so I savor the  toasty rays saying to myself,  " another good sign." 
Like Catherine De Medici I am superstitious that way. 
Only she had visions and unfortunately I don't.
It might have proven useful later in the day. 
I layout the dress (which had its own suitcase - yup the entire suitcase had just one dress in it along with about 500 reams of tissue paper and crinkled dry cleaning plastic.) 
Put out the makeup.  Now, the makeup artist was bringing everything however, I am also the type who ALWAYS COMES PREPARED.  So I brought all of my "on camera hi-def" makeup --- in case we had a difference of opinion. 
As it turns out the makeup artist was an absolute angel along with being a great instructor on how one puts on false eyelashes.  A skill I have yet to attain.  She applies excessive eye makeup - up close this doesn't look natural, but does wonders when under bright lights. 
One must learn these things.
I had some slight misgivings on the hair-do when she teased it so that I looked like a raven colony had decided to nest, but she assuaged my doubts by stating, "by the time you get there it will have settled down."  My fleeting thought was, "hope the chicks are fed by then."

After she left it was time to put on the dress. 
A slight nervous breakdown occurred when the dress that fit perfectly in New York, suddenly would not zip up the back.  Hubby proved useless in this matter.  I think hubbies are usually useless in this matter of stuck zippers, but the only female I knew had just left so I was having a minor sweat attack along with worrying about the hair.  However, after15 minutes and endless attempts, the recalcitrant zipper decided to "play nice." Whew. 
Reapply deodorant.... carefully.   Then, shoes (which have been sanded on bottom so no slipping occurs) gold jewelry (not from Cartier but from Italy),  bag (remember to bring ID and cash plus I-phone -- on vibrate please , no room for a brush but the cement hairspray hopefully will hold out.)
Look in the mirror and   .......   THE TRANSFORMATION HAS BEEN ACHIEVED!
Like Maria in "West Side Story"  I feel pretty.  Hallelujah! 
I am ready with time to spare. 
Oh and in between hubby got dressed too.  But who really cared about that? Just kidding.  He looked very handsome. My leading man.

The phone vibrates.  It's the director.  "Don't worry, but the car that is coming to pick you up is running about 20 minutes late.  We can't arrive together. But the event is 5 minutes away so you should be OK.  We won't walk without you." 
20 minutes goes by.  No one arrives.  I call and get voicemail.  GREAT.
Finally another call.  "He is stuck in traffic.  He will be another 10 minutes." 
We were supposed to have been there by now.  After all this preparation I am going to miss the entire thing.
Another 15 minutes.  The anti-perspirant has stopped working. Voicemail. Again.
What to do? What to do?  Should I just hike up my dress and run over? 
(I told you how self-sufficient I can be. Plus I'm fit, remember?)
Finally, a call, "he should be there."  I am exhausted and the event is yet to happen.
I am thinking,  "can't something go smoothly, just once?"  Hubby about to give me a mini-massage and I scream, "watch the hair, watch the hair!"  Ah love.

We arrive. 
It looks exactly as one expects it too.  Lots of spectators milling about.  Lots and lots of press and photographers. Everyone is smiling. You can tell just by looking for the most part, who are the actors versus the directors, writers and producers.  The actors are always dressed and coiffed to the hilt.  It's just the way it is.  Plus their teeth are always so startlingly white. 
(Note to self: You forgot to doooooo thaaaaat! - 95% wattage will have to suffice)  
My director (whom I adore)  and executive producers look splendid and beautiful and radiant. 
And we are all smiling. 
We are assigned a handler.  This individual will escort us through the aisle leading up to the stage at our appointed time.  As we progress forward, people are waving hello and kissing the air and saying things like, "Let's meet for drinks later."  It's hard to hear anything.  I think I am being told to talk about the "female" slant of this film but can't really hear.  And now it's our turn.  The executive producer makes sure the film's poster is placed just so. 
It's time to step on the carpet which is a rich deep red.  
I give myself a moment to take it all in and "own it."  
I am not nervous at all.  In fact, I plan to have a ball. 
The camera's flash, light's pop everywhere, and as we progress down the stage we are stopped by reporters.  My lovely director introduces me as coming "all the way from New York City" which is touching, and the reporter looks at me and declares after having asked me about my role in the film, "How can you be from New York? You are so nice!"  I laughed at that and said, "It's hard not to be when one is in Texas. I think I will move here!"  I think she liked that. 
And so it went.  We were interviewed by the press for both print and TV and web and posed and smiled and laughed for about 45 minutes.  Ann -Margaret even interrupted me.  (It's okay to be cut off  by a legend.) 
Then it was over. Just like that. 
It was a piece of cake and I had a grand old time.  
I couldn't believe that I was even asked "who I wore." Hilarious.

Film premieres. Kiss, kiss, hug, hug.  Let's change and meet for drinks -----   Remember that dear reader!  You think I've already described the agony? HA!
We all part.  Hubby and I return to hotel suite.   Have about an hour and a half to kill before going out again.  Shower, change, very casual, low-key no pressure now.  Lost an eyelash in bathroom anyway. Impossible to locate. Hair back to raven color instead of avian gathering.  
Relaxing when hubby comes from living room to bedroom where I am resting, holding his stomach.  He lies down on bed and says.  "I don't feel so well." 
Not the least bit concerned I say - "What do you mean?" 
"My stomach  hurts."  (His stomach always hurts.)
"It's probably just gas, roll around on the bed a bit," I state unsympathetically. 
I am thinking, "what now, we have to go out soon!"
He moves around for about 5 minutes. Then doubles over and breaks out in a cold sweat.
"I am really in pain all of a sudden."  Jeez.
"Did you eat something since we came back?"  I am still not buying into this.
"No and I am really in pain.  Do you think I should go to the emergency room?"
This gets my attention. 
My husband would NEVER, EVER ASK ME if he should go to any emergency room. 
"You  would never, ever ask me if I think you should go to the emergency room!" I cry.
"Are you having an appendix attack?" 
We prod and poke.  His pain is kind of on the side of his waist.  No organ we can remember being there. 
"Are you sure you didn't eat something?"  "Are you having a heart attack?"
Even though the pain is located on his  right side and below the rib cage, I am starting now to worry. Big time.
He can't stand up but says,   "Maybe it will subside. After all we are going home tomorrow."
"If you are even thinking of an emergency room it means you should go. You can't have this happening on the plane. And what are you talking about anyway? You are white as newly bleached teeth and sweat is pouring off of you!" 
I pick up the phone to the receptionist. 
"My husband has become desperately ill.  Where is the nearest hospital?"
Being Texan, they were all so wonderful and helpful. Immediately.  No questions or attitudes.
Maybe we should move here.

We wind up at Baylor Hospital emergency room. 
Needless to say, an emergency room in downtown Dallas at midnight is as far away from a red carpet crowd as can be.  Plus their computer system went down resulting in  a 3 hour delay because processing all the incoming patients has to be done manually.  No one is used to doing that anymore. 
We sit in plastic chairs surrounded by moaning, suffering, bleeding, a screeching cat fight over a pimp, ( I kid you not) , a man who had beige bugs crawling over him, (is this a vision?!?) and mayhem until he is finally admitted at 4:15 AM. 
The admitting nurse asks us if we are willing to pay a $100 charge and is surprised when we say "yes." 
It appears that no one ever does.
Blood work, x-rays, and c-scans later, the doctor comes in to tell us - "Kidney Stones."
??!!!**##??!!!!!
Incredible. 
My husband looks at me, and with a twinkle in his eye restored, now that he is on mega-pain killers, and quips, "Well it's a good thing this didn't happen earlier.  You would have left me at the emergency room door. And I would have wanted you to. "  I say, "You are absolutely right, but I would have come back as soon as  it was all over."  Ah,  devotion.

We got back to the hotel at 6:30 AM.  And crashed.  Then hopped on a plane home by 4pm.

I think all the partying was over by then.  I didn't bother to check.  I didn't care.  I had my moment and more importantly, my husband by my side. 

So while everyone thinks I was living it up and leading such a glamorous life....

I say, "it's the grits that count."   Without love, it ain't much.  Ah Amore.  A-men.

BEAUTY TIP  --    studies show that wearing red increases athletic performance and may lead to more confidence. It may even make you push harder while working out!

Next.....  Carrots, Crunches, and Munchies

Hey follow me, just press the "f" button which isn't obscene just friendly. althoughwhateverworksforyou!

#6 HOT OVER 40! BRAZIL, BIKINIS & ME (MY SECRET BIKINI FITNESS WEAPON REVEALED)

 I 

 MY SECRET FITNESS WITNESS WEAPON.

IT HAS BEEN 4 YEARS NOW- STILL SIZE 4 - STILL FIT AND ON FIRE- FOLLOW ME ON FACEBOOK AND TWITTER AND I WILL CONTINUE TO SHOW YOU HOW AND SUPPORT YOU. I WANT YOU TO HAVE THE SAME JOURNEY OF EXCITEMENT AND FULFILLMENT AS I HAD. I AM WITH YOU ALWAYS 500%! BLUE COLLAR GALS UNITE!

IRA  More info click on
IMDB www.imdb.me/joannabonaro

My story:

As a cervical/ovarian cancer survivor I knew deep down that I should feel happy. 

Nevertheless, I was in a constant state of despair, especially getting dressed

 in the morning when I would longingly look at my “old” clothes which I

refused to throw out or give away, but which almost 7 years later I still

could not fit into. 

And let’s not even mention the idea of the bikini!

I thought I would have to eventually resign myself to a “perfect” size 10, until one

day I saw a notice for volunteers to undergo a pilot exercise program entitled

 “Brazil ButtLift with Leandro Carvalho” the trainer for many Victoria Secret models. 

The producers made us stand in front of a huge display of a bikini clad model

on a sun drenched Brazilian beach, announcing a grand prize trip to Rio de Janeiro. 

They took pictures of us and asked us to talk into the camera, saying something

about winning the trip to Brazil.

I quipped  about my very own yellow bikini collecting dust on the shelf.

To my surprise I was chosen.  I started the program.

 I met Leandro – The man who would change my life.   

Leandro turned out to be a warm, very energetic and highly knowledgeable trainer

par excellence, who demanded our utmost.   

One of his favorite statements is, “Don’t settle for less.”

The workouts were tough, but the challenge was exhilarating, and the exercises varied. 

As the weeks progressed, I started to look forward to exercise as more of a pleasant

diversion instead of as an onerous activity. 

I also started to think about a certain yellow bikini.

My favorite exercises were the ones that focused on “the tummy,” or as the class was to

 become known as “Brazil Tummy Tuck.”  The concept of tightened obliques became

less oblique as the weeks went by. 

Leandro’s favorite command -”More definition in your movement, more definition in your body.”

Well, I was starting to see definition on my arms, my thighs, and yes my stomach. 

Those were victorious defining moments for me.  I was learning what I needed to do to

 transform my body and I was seeing results. 

The inches were melting away. 

Yes it was hard work, and yes I was committed.

As I had read in a great novel somewhere, “What would it be worth if it were easy?”  

By week 11 out of 12 in the program I had lost 27 lbs and a lot of overall inches.

After the program ended, they took “after” shots of us all.

 They interviewed us and asked, “Will you be the one who wins the trip to Brazil?” 

I remember saying, “I have already won more than you can imagine.”

When I got home, I didn’t even glance at the clothes about which I had been opining. 

Instead, I ran to the shelf that held the zippered bag, that housed the wrinkled yellow bikini. 

I put it on. It fit.  In fact, it was too baggy.  I think at that point I cried. 

I finally felt as if I had been given my life back.  It was my self image.  My identity. 

The person who looked familiar again when I looked in the mirror. 

In fact, she looked even better than before.   I was “the new old Joanna.” 

And I needed a new bikini.

And yes, wonder of wonders, I also won the trip to Brazil. I went to Rio de Janeiro

and wore a teeny, weeny, itsy, bitsy, turquoise bikini on Ipanema Beach. 

Now, over two years later, I own a red one too, along with a whole new size 4 wardrobe. 

I go to the gym now with glee to work out with Leandro and keep up the pace with gusto

or pop in a Brazil Tummy Tuck and Brazil Buttlift Workout DVD and think about

when I’ll be going back to Rio!  

Next time I’ll be in yellow ! With feathers!

My secret weapon revealed -  Leandro Carvalho – Master Mind behind (no pun intended)

BRAZIL BUTTLIFT W/ LEANDRO CARVALHO  - DVD FITNESS SERIES  

SO More info click on

IMDB www.imdb.me/joannabonaro
WEBSITE   www.joannabonaro.com

FOLLOW ME ON TWITTER AND FACEBOOK - CONTINUAL UPDATES ON EXERCISE , FOOD , NUTRITION AND OF COURSE BIKINI SHOTS.  THE MASTER HAS TO SHOW OFF HIS WORK YOU KNOW!

NOURISHMENT AND FULFILLMENT TIP - 

 eating foods that have a low value on the

               glycemic index scale are the key to sustainable weight loss ---

        filling and delicious low GI foods are 

broccoli (15), apples (38), sweet potatoes (54)

#5 HOT OVER 40! FROM RED CARPET TO HILARITY (Part 1) #5

This blog is founded on helping women over 40 feel empowered and very pretty on a day to day basis.  I have been in the image industry where how you look and present yourself is of the utmost importance for most of my adult life.  At times the only requisite when you walk in a room is how you look.  In the cosmetic industry, the first thing that was drummed into my head was, "Image is everything."  This rule applies itself everyday, but amplify it one hundred fold in the entertainment industry.
As is apparent,  I am not a star, (still I work) a renowned great beauty, (considered pretty) or leggy stick thin model, (size 4 is borderline ok - 6 still considered fat) but I have seen what goes on behind the glamour curtain.
Baby, you ain't born that way. So here is the grit behind the glimmer.

I quite unexpectedly got a call to Walk the Red Carpet at the Dallas Int'l Film Festival for a film I was cast in, "Traveling."
I will admit  - Yes! I was pretty excited. 
And for all you denigrators - So, so sorry it wasn't Cannes, or Sundance or Holly Lolly Wood.
              (BTW - Maria Bello and Anne Margaret opened the festival)
At least I get to say I did it. 
It may be the only time.
Or it may be have been good practice for the future. 
Who knows?
This blog, however, is what went on BEFORE the event. The next blog will focus on AFTER.
I call it From Red Carpet to Reality - or Hilarity. 

Walking the Red Carpet!  I got quite an amount of positive support, (thank you, thank you, thank you) along with lots of questions.
"How did you prepare for it?"
"Wow! Was it wonderful?"
"Were you nervous in front of the cameras?"
and of course
"What are you going to wear?"
So the journey began...
After it sank in, I basically panicked because I don't have
1. an assistant 2. a stylist 3. an image consultant
4. a press agent or any other of the cadre of people
that do all the work for you, behind the scenes.
Then I took a deep breathe and remembered that I do
1. have my own sense of style 2. know my image
3. am a self starter and 4.  have lots of marketing experience.
In other words --- I had confidence in myself. 
That adds up to a whole lot of pretty before one even starts. 
But really, that's just minutae. 
Let's get to the important stuff....the dress.
Off I went - to every store in NYC. I wanted to wear red. My color.  Always lots of compliments.  EXCEPT --- Valentine's Day had just passed, the new Spring fashions were on display, and the colors this season, as I came to be aware (or be wary of) are beige, orange and green. Cafeteria colors.
Now what was I supposed to do with that? 
Needless to say, there was nary a red dress in any store in all of New York City.  Hrrrmph. 
I would also like to mention the word,  "PROM."  Yes, that time of year was approaching, so looking for a tasteful cocktail dress amidst, froth, fluff, netting in unlikely places, exceedingly short hemlines and pastel pink was no easy task either.
After purchasing a total of 6, yes 6 dresses, (hope you are factoring all this travel, time, effort and indecision in the dressing room + hubby stating, "another one?") my dear friend said to me while I unhappily modelled a lilac concoction in my bedroom, " Do you want me to come with you to return the dress at the Madison Avenue store?" ( I can perform in front of hundreds but returning a purchase from Madison Avenue brings on frissons of fear)  I said, "yes, yes, yes!" 
Off we went. 
In the window was a black dress with gold necklace collar that I would have never picked out. 
She said, "That's the one." 
I said, "No, I will not wear black on camera, I never wear gold, plus too formal." 
She countered with, "Shut-up and listen to me for once in your life, you will look elegant and sophisticated." 
I said begrudgingly, "Well, I can try it on." 
Guess who was right? 
Oh it was Max Azria for those who care.

Part 2 will describe the experience and OH!!! the afterwards.
Otherwise known as "The Ecstacy then the Agony."
For the record, I did not trip.

PRACTICAL FASHION TIP  -- when wearing new shoes, sandpaper the bottom of the soles. The roughened texture guarantees you won't slip on carpeted or wooden floors.

    

#3 HOT OVER 40! MIRROR MIRROR ON THE WALL!

I was eating, yes actually eating, today at a trendy little place in Alphabet City.  I had just worked out intensely with my favorite Brazilian trainer (more about that in future posts) and decided to treat myself to a healthy veggie whole yolk egg omelette along with an everything bagel, meaning my omelette was actually yellow not white, and in reverse, my bread was white and not brown.  I was feeling a bit guilty because I am not used to those colors on my AM plate - I usually eat egg whites only, hold the toast and just have some sliced tomatoes on the side.  I call that my "red toast" special.  But my body was sending me signals that I absolutely could not ignore. So in order to shut it up and reduce my Sunday morning stress I gave in to yellow and starch.  I  already know what some of you must be thinking. "Jeez, when I have a special weekend breakfast, it's banana pancakes with chocolate chips!"
But the point about this blog is not about pigging out. 
It's actually about listening.
When I used to read articles about listening to what your body tells you, I couldn't relate.  I didn't understand what that meant in terms of healthy eating choices.  Yes, it often screamed, "chocolate please!" - sometimes not that politely. Or gaily chirped, "baked white potato with butter-yum!"  It never said, "kindly pass on the garlic bread sticks and get me some apples." 
I was very jealous of the women who could sit for an entire meal with chips and dip in front of them and nibble on just one! We women do notice these things out of the corner of our eyes while gorging.  Come on now! Admit it.
However, after finally losing my PC weight (post cancer - more on that in a future blog) as a result of proper training (from said Brazilian trainer)  and experiencing very healthy and tasteful food choices and steadfastly adhering to them for a long period of time - my body did start to talk to me as it had never done before. 
It even started to surprise me with what it was saying.
It now actually craved salad and broccoli, carrots, cantoloupe, grilled salmon and camomile tea with lemon not milk. Drinking lots of water became easy. It started to get with the program so that mind and stomach weren't always at war.  A peace treaty of sorts had occurred and my heart happily signed on with a sigh of relief. 
So now when my body says, "you need to have some steak today", or crackers, or a sesame almond cookie or two, I actually listen to it.  Because now it doesn't say it to me very often.  So I give in.
Do I feel guilty? Well yes I do, because I will admit I am still going through some issues and I want to still lose 5 more of the Xmas season 10.
The difference - and this is key - is that my body is telling me something intelligent now. 
It is saying, "you have been stressed so I need a just a bit more today in this area to feel better, and if you give it to me I won't bother you again for awhile." Not, "load up on the cheese laden pasta in the mega bowl."  Just, " a little yolk and 1/2 a bagel will do."
My body feels better and my emotional state after giving in feels great too. The temper tantrum rackets between stomach and brain have been quelled.  I know that I will eventually lose the 5 more pounds in reasonable time with continued exercise and healthy eating.
I had to go to the ladies room after my very delicious breakfast and what did I discover? 
The mirror on the wall had the following words stencilled on the bottom, "don't you look good today!" Really.  I swear.  On Ave A and 12th street.
Check it out if you don't believe me.
Isn't it nice when the mirror is on your side?

EXERCISE & FITNESS TIP:   Leandro Carvalho Super Trainer to the Stars -  DVD Brazil Butt Lift with Leandro Carvalho,  via Beachbody Productions   http://www.beachbody.com/ OR http://www.leandrofitness.com/